M0NDAY BLUNDER

Soo much for my attitude last night which was " My Monday's gonna be very PRODUCTIVE! "  Soooo much for that. I was hoping my Monday would be uber productive that I will be able to reward myself with something great by the end of the day, but now I'm feeling kinda , okay not kinda, but VERY disappointed... My Monday was not how I thought it would go. =(


Always kept it in my mind that it would be PRODUCTIVE so that the rest of the week it would be PRODUCTIVE, but my Monday failed me. Or have I failed myself? 


I would really hate to think that I have failed myself because I've really tried, but then something always manages to fuck things up. Like today, my eyes hurt real bad which causes my head to hurt. I still don't know why I haven't attempted to buy a new pair of glasses ( maybe because the one I want is a bit too pricey haha ) . But my goal in 15 more days to buy new glasses to help my eyes, astigmatism, and to help stop my headache. 


err. Ookay, one thing I really hate about me is when my head starts hurting freakishly much my brain stops functioning right there, like everything shuts down and I just wanna curl up in a corner OR IN MY OWN BED and just sleep it off. Thank god for flexi time for work. Seriously I don't know if its my sinusitis or what. But it is killing me. What a way to start my MONDAY. I hope tomorrow will be better since its the first of a new month. PLEASE FEB.1 BE GOOD TO ME.

HAPPY 72nd MONTHSARY.. good or bad?

HAPPY 72nd MONTH JOSE !


WOW. we've been playing each other for so long now. HAHA. KIDDING . 
From the start on how we met through FRIENDSTER till now , its been one helluva rollercoaster ride for the both of us. We can even ask everyone who knows us REAL GOOD , all they can answer about us is HAY NKU . But somehow it's weird how we still find a way back to each other after disasters. Pretty aaawwessomeeee that you can put up with me after everything.We're both still young so let's just go wherever life takes us. <3

CHOOSE..

 " Do we fall back on what we know , or do we step forward to something new? "

" Fighter "

" Fighter "

After all you put me through
You'd think I'd despise you
But in the end I wanna thank you
'Cause you made that much stronger

Well I thought I knew you
Thinking that you were true
Guess I, I couldn't trust called your bluff
Time is up, 'cause I've had enough
You were there by my side
Always down for the ride
But your joy ride just came down in flames
'Cause your greed sold me out in shame, mmm hmm

After all of the stealing and cheating
You probably think that
I hold resentment for you
But uh uh, oh no, you're wrong

'Cause if it wasn't for all
That you tried to do
I wouldn't know just how capable I am to pull through
So I wanna say thank you

'Cause it
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

Never saw it coming
All of your backstabbing
Just so, you could cash in on a good thing
Before I'd realized your game

I heard you're going 'round
Playin' the victim now
But don't even begin feelin' I'm the one to blame
'Cause you dug your own grave

After all of the fights and the lies
Guess you're wanting to hurt me
But that won't work anymore
No more, uh uh, it's over

'Cause if it wasn't for all of your torture
I wouldn't know how to be this way now
And never back down
So I wanna say thank you

'Cause it
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter

Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

How could this man I thought I know
Turn out to be unjust so cruel?
Could only see the good in you
Pretended not to see the truth

You tried to hide your lies
Disguise yourself through
Living in denial
But in the end you'll see
You won't stop me

I am a fighter
(I'm a fighter)
I ain't gonna stop
(I ain't gonna stop)
There is no turning back
I've had enough

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter

Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

Thought I would forget
But I, I remember
Yes I remember
I'll remember

Thought I would forget
But I remember
Yes I remember
I'll remember

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter

Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

Has anyone ever actually sat down and listened to the song " Fighter " by Christina Aguilera? From her old album Stripped? GOOD ASS SONG . I ain't gonna lie but I loved her for it when this album came out and after I heard this song. Whenever I listen to it, it's like instantly I wanna forget the bullshit and just say FUCK IT , i'm gonna do me, i'm gonna be, and i'm gonna do whatever the hell i want. Automatically, I know I don't need alot of people in my life if most of them aren't real. I don't need the people who don't have RESPECT for me the way I had for them , and I don't need people who act like they accept me but they really don't. But still, like in the song I need to THANK those people for helping me realize this. 

There are some that really really know me, like right through my skin , the whole me, inside and out, and I know they know who I can be when I'm really pushed. Like you all know, I was raised well by my Dad, but when the time comes I really am pushed to the limit. My mouth will just keep going and going and I will seriously kill you with my words, no lie. Don't take my kindness to another level where you end up not having respect for me, God made us all equal so please, you want me to respect you respect me , if we are cool with that, then I love you forever, but if not. I won't waste my time on you. 

I realized there are also some where I don't show them the real me, where I am majorly nice, but then I realize they take advantage of that which slowly makes me free the evil from within that I really don't want to happen, because I seriously can do damage. I guess looking back at Middle School, the people who realize that I have to be mean at times and literally taught me how to be mean , I could use now. But ever since I got into a fight when I was younger and embarrassed the shit out of my dad by getting a call from the cops and my dad was a cop then, I guess I promised myself I wouldn't be mean and I will keep my mouth shut. BUT SERIOUSLY I CANT KEEP THAT PROMISE ANYMORE . I cant get by the world being nice to everyone , I am going to be demanding when I need to demand things, I am going to be a bitch when I need to tell a person straight to stay in check and stay away from me if they are in a bitchy mood and wants to make me feel stupid and to back the fuck off cause I'm serious.  

I still can't get over the fact that I moved here and back to the Philippines. WHY DID I DO THAT?! SERIOUSLY WHY?!. I've experienced everything here just by moving here . HELL AND BACK . Endless nights where I would cry because . WHO IS REAL HERE WHERE YOU CAN ACTUALLY RUN TO . ONLY A GOOD FEW . But I still kept it together even though I know my worth and what I can do when I get mad. So please, please, don't push me to my limit. Both sides of my family are bitchy, demanding, in short they get what they want and they won't let anyone step on them. I admit I broke the line when I was born but now, as I'm learning more to live here in Philippines and meeting new people ( WHICH there are a few who are already on my hit list ) that I will show that I did not disapoint my family line both sides . 

Anyways. I think I'm done raging online. Anyways. The song up top means a lot to me. If you're lucky to really know the real me, you would understand why. But seriously, I love this song and I just wanted to share it with you guys and for those who haven't listened to it yet. It helps just by listening to it =)

FASTFORWARDDDDD ..

I like my outfit today. I mean it's nothing to be WOW'd really about but I am just loving my neon green cheetah print racer back.  Or maybe I'm loving my outfit because the most expensive thing out of it was my black cardigan costing PHP.300. HAHA! I love tiangges with cheap thrills =)! .

See, it's not that BOOM WOW outfit but just right for a chilly lazy day in the Philippines. And okay, fine I'm gonna admit I liked the outfit because the most expensive buy was the black cardigan :D . 

Cardigan: PHP.300
Leggings: PHP.200
Flats: PHP.200
Neon Green Cheetah Print Racer Back : PHP. 50

Hello Kitty Pin & Necklace : FREEE

Oh Sorry . Kinda hefty. Trying to Diet. HAHA.

I don't know why I had the urge to pin a Hello Kitty pin on my cardigan. I just thought it was a way for the black cardigan to have a little UMPF in it. hahah!

But yeah, I really love ukays and tiangges. You can find alot of unique things that no one else has. But please don't think that all my belongings come from there cause I swear you'd also be surprised to find things that you won't believe I own. Ha. Ha. 

L0MOGRAPHY

Will try to MASTER this . But why are the films in Team Manila for this are sooooo .. expensive T.T

HAiR EXTENSIONS & LiPSHix

I cut my hair short, not too long ago. It was one of those days that all of a sudden I couldn't do anything else with my hair and it was as dead as it can get, like double dead meat. So then I was like okay I think I'm gonna get a hairTRIM.  I really don't have a salon that I go to everytime I cut my hair like a permanent one, so I was still wondering where I should get it trimmed. The last place I got it cut was at Tony & Jackey's , i love how korean people do hair but all they did with mine was layer it and just made it more thinner. That's when my face looked fatter than normal, but yeah they do good with hair.. FOR ME in MY OPINION . Then I recalled I had gotten my hair cut at David's and that was the one I loved the most. It was when Rihanna's short do was totally in and ( I noticed after my haircut) that everyone had the same 'do. Fail. But I loved how they did it. So, I decided to try out Going Straight Salon. UHM. I don't know if the stylist was getting tired or sleepy but I feel like my hair was played around with. Seriously. And yet, another FAIL. On the birghter side, I got banging bangs and my hair started growing faster. But seriously, I really did not know what went on in that stylists' mind when he went for my hair. 


So now, I was thinking, I mean I love my hair with my whole heart even if I caused it damage by having to deal with the stylist and his scissors, but I feel like I want to try hair extensions. =) 

The downfall for me though is that I really don't know what color my hair is. What if I think its some kind of brown color then when I attach it, it's a whole different color! But I think it would be fun to try and suprise everyone I know have long hair. HAHA. But seriously I would like to try.

Aside from wanting to try hair extensions, I'm a sucker for make up, any kind from the eye shadows, lipsticks, etc. I finally was able to get my hands on Maybelline New York's Lip Smooth Care Tinted Lip Balm in Strawberry! . I first purchased the reddish colored one and I instantly fell in love with it. That's why I couldn't wait to get my hands on the pinkish colored  one. It protected my kisses and gave it a pinkish color thats just oh so cute and that matched perfectly with me. It doesn't make my lips chap also like the other ones that I've tried so I'm glad to stay I've finally found a lip balm that I'm going to stick with for awhile. =) . 

MORNING CRANKiNESS

i feel sooooooo cranky or more moody.


I believe when you start your week bad, like when you first get up in the morning on MONDAY  , your whole week just goes bad. So I try my best to start every MONDAY  "bright and shiny" , but unlucky me, I started this week bad.


I know mothers are supposed to know best and everything, wait before I start this off, don't judge me I respect my family and I respect everyone elses' , but its just one of those days and blogging helps de-stress. So anyways, my mother all of a sudden just wants to unleash the dragon out on me for no reason. Maybe because I just got spotted and she took out her rage on me. Which I think is totally not cool but I know alot of people can feel me on this one but jeez! Isn't it a pain in the ass though! I thought I would be better off if I just don't talk to her but then JEEz , I got aimed at again this morning, which totally turned into a feud. OH WELL. nothing will change if i keep bitchin , just have to move on..


dear the rest of the week.. please do me good. I could use a picker upper this week.  


jee.i swear my blogs going emo. haha

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME =)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME =)

Thank you Lord for the 23 Years of life you've given me and all the blessings that you have blessed me with. I know there is nothing that you wouldn't throw at me that I can't handle. Thank you for preparing me for the life journey that you are writing me. 

SHORT BUT SIMPLE

I sore for the New Year I would have a new attitude and get rid of my anger in side mode but then again it's really hard. I mean it's not that I'm motivated into doing it but I just can't help it when someone pisses me the fuck off. Ok I admit I do get mad which makes me human because other people thought I was always happy. FUCK NO. Haha. I am human.I was just raised to control all anger after fighting and getting in trouble while your dad was a police. That was sucha a no no. So after that, I swear to keep calm in all situations so I hold back everything and what is gay it comes out in tears. HAHA.


1 More Day Left =) I do hope I get an Onigiri <3

BACK TO REALITY OPS THERE GOES GRAVITY

First day back at work and my brain is still on vacation mode ..

TAGAYTAY is love .. for me

In a way it was a little relaxing to spend the last few MINUTES in Tagaytay.I missed going there. I remember when my friends and I were still going to school , or graduating school, we would all *suprise* pick each other up in a beat up old L300 at night and drive up there just to chill. Now, since almost everyone is busy with JOBS ( yes amazing how everyone has jobs now ha. ha) we rarely get to see each other and spend time with each other. So that's why its kinda relaxing to go up there and eat BULALO! =).

Yes.. BULALO is really good on really cold nights. This is what I love about Tagaytay. It ruined my "no rice" diet because this won't be a great meal without rice. 

For great Bulalo and a great view of Tagaytay and the Taal volcano, I suggest you visit Greenats.

The place got bigger =) . It has such a nice ambiance and the view ( again yes I repeated ) is just amazing especially during the day or when the sun is about to go down because you have a great view of Tagaytay , either in little kubos or regular tables. It doesn't matter if you can't see the view at night because you wouldn't mind that because of the strong winds that will have your asses really cold and wanting their bulalo. 

I can't wait to go back to relax. I was planning on the weekend of my birthday to spend the weekend there then get a boat ride to the Taal volcano, but things came up. So hopefully next time. Hopefully next time also, I will be able to experience Batangas and Puerto Gallera. Yes I know, I am so late but what the hell. I'm still young =)